The Reason Why He Won’t Marry You: Book Review of Qualified, yet Single

24 May

The first chapter of my novel, Wife 101, is appropriately titled, The Reason Why He Won’t Marry You. I have received a lot of raised eyebrows and interested glances from the title alone.The truth is that single women want to know the secret: Why won’t men commit?

I address a few of these concerns in Wife 101, but recently I was elated to read a book that validated my written stance and provided a professional perspective on what keeps a good man from popping the question. Below is my review of Dr. Dwayne Buckingham’s newly release book: Qualified, yet Single: Why Good Men Remain Single. Enjoy!
In Qualified, yet Single, Dr. Dwayne Buckingham breaks down the emotional, mental, and social implications of commitment from a man’s point-of-view. The purpose of this book is to examine the phenomenon of the increasing number of “good men” who are not married or struggle with commitment, and identify the emotional issues that are commonly linked to their behavior. Dr. Buckingham communicates to both women and men in this book, addressing underlying problems and deep rooted challenges that men must deal with to be “emotionally available” to be in a serious relationship and/or successful marriage.

Qualified, yet Single is appropriately divided into several sections to provide easy comprehension for the reader. Sections include a Glossary of Terms, Preface/Introduction, Chapter 1: Great Candidate but Not Qualified to be in a Relationship, Chapter 2: Why is it So Difficult for Single Good Men to Abandon Singlehood, Chapter 3: The Screening Guide: How Not to Waste Your Time, and Epilogue. In addition, Dr. Buckingham provides signs of abusive relationships, excerpts from interviews, groups, and real life conversations with single men, and evaluative questions that women can use to assess their mate, self, and the relationship.

I loved reading Qualified, yet Single. The book was so interesting that I read it in a matter of  a few hours; I just couldn’t put it down. For anyone (male or female) who wants to better understand the barriers in a man’s life that negatively impacts his ability to commit, this is a great resource. The pros of this book: Extremely well written with minimal grammatical errors, a licensed psychotherapist’s advice/perspective on dating and marriage, a thorough assessment of factors related to the topic, practical examples, and the writer’s voice being professional, yet relatable and easy to comprehend. The cons of this book: There really weren’t any major cons, but for the sake of being evaluative, the only apprehension that I have about the book is that married women (which whom the book really isn’t written for) may read it, find truisms about their marriage/husbands, and take the advice to walk away from an emotionally unavailable husband. I caution married women who read this book to realize the difference between dating and marriage, and to honor their vows even if their husband shows signs of a lack of emotional readiness. Overall, Dr. Buckingham has penned a highly-needed guide to relationships that is founded on field experience and research. In a society where persons with no credentials or professional expertise can write books on dating and get women to naively take the advice, it is refreshing to read a book by a qualified, individual and marriage therapist.

This review is available on and

For more information about Dr. Buckingham or Single, yet Qualified visit his website at

For more information about Wife 101 visit

Single, yet Qualified is featured as a recommended read in the Summer Edition of Book Club 101 Magazine


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